When I think of kak Shima and Ramadhan, I also think of..

..STEAMED FISH ala kak Shima!

My housemate kak Shima used to make this all the time, especially during the fasting month. Somehow, the last few weeks, I've been thinking of this haha.. boley?

Actually, I made this a few weeks ago but since I want ot perabis buang all the entry tertangguh, especially ones involving food (and right before Ramadhan hehe..)..

Anyway, its quite simple, what kak Shima would call campak² shj.. See!

Campak² je.. and using any vege you have in your fridge ☺ I used some green pepper, tomatoes and baby corn. And since I ♥ mushrooms, I had put a whole packet here too. Then only had to squeeze some lime on top and voila~

I actually did this during Izati's birthday on the 10th earlier this month aritu and since she wasn't here, I sent her the picture telling her its the thought of cooking for her that counts hehe.. jahat kan kak Yong dia?

And the taste?

Simply superb! Org tak makan sayur pun will eat all those vegetables up tau..

Mmm~mmm..

Has anyone seen where my patience has gone to? =(

..and I was so happy today!

I'd finished making 50++ cupcakes for my class tonight at 2.00pm this afternoon and was looking forward to give it to them. I really wanted to suprise them and make them happy coz we won't be seeing each other for a month after this, and tho I won't tell them in their face, I knew I was gonna miss them..

Then I finally went to the Yusuf Taiyoob factory me and my friends have planned to go for ages now.

I was smiling the whole day and was singing along as I went to the tuition centre with my Tupperwares full of cupcakes and 2 boxes of dates for Aza and kak Sawiyah who have helped me a lot.

The class started okay². They listened when I was babbling in front (well, almost all laaa..) and at least tried to answer the questions I gave them tho I knew most of them hated Earth as A Sphere. Around 9.45pm, I went to my car (yg sy parking sgt jauh!) to get the cakes I'd hidden in my car.

Berat tak bwk bnyk tu sorg², naik tangge plak tu =(

When some of them noticed my cakes, they whooped with joy and this made me even more happy BUT..

..after that ade je yg tak kene!

I had left the Tupperwares at Aza while I finished the class.. or at least tried to laaa..

When I asked them to discuss the questions with me, most were talking. It started to annoy me when I had to keep talking louder and louder just to hear myself teach. But when it came to the point where I saw almost all the boys at the back talking, and some girls texting thru their phone WHILE I WAS TALKING, I just LOST IT!

No, I didn't scream at them or anything.. I guess I just gave up.

I wrote the answers on the board (and still they talked as loudly as ever) and kept whispering to myself pleading to them, "Not now, please not now!"

And to cool myself down, I went out to Aza with hopes that they would write down the answers I had given them.

After a while, I felt a bit guilty towards them so I started to go back in class.. it was only 5 minutes (Yes, I looked at my watch the whole time) I had planned to give my biggest fake smile to my class, hand out the cupcakes I had made especially for them since the morning and try to forget hat they had gotten on my nerves a few minutes earlier. I almost manged to convince myself I was overreacting while I started pushing the door.

Guess what?

Some of the boys at the back had already kept all their books in their bags and were standing and walking around in class.. LAUGHING!

That does it!

I went to take my things and sekali lagi mengangkut Tupperware² yg penuh itu turun bawah pulak! Klau sy tau, baik sy tak payah angkut naik atas tadi tu.

And up until 9.45pm, things were just perfect.. what went wrong?

I felt to frustrated.. and sad! I so wanted to do something to make them happy as it was the last class before our month-long vacation. I was so looking forward to give them something I hoped they would like.. but they don't appreciate me at all!

Sedih nye sy.. ='(

I really, really didn't want to make a scene ke ape ke.. I wanted us to part happily so that sebulan ni takde rase tak puas hati ke ape ke.. but they must hate me now!

God! I really don't understand kenape la my patience nowadays ni sgt short-lived?

I was never the most patient person on earth, but I'm also not the most short-tempered one either. Most of my students won't even describe me as garang ke ape ke but these few weeks, I've been quite on the emotional roller coaster.

A few weeks ago, while I was teaching the same class, they were talking so loudly and not even looking at me while I tried to show them how to do the problem, I just burst into tears! Boleh ka cikgu pi nangis dlm kelas sbb student buat?!? Adoi la Ayu, what happened here?!

I was so ashamed of myself that when I had composed myself, I couldn't even look at them..

Then last week, 10 minutes before my class ended, sy dgn jayenye telah menghalau all the boys in my form 2 class coz they were talking too much in class. But at least I manged to make it up to them this week..

This class camne? I won't be seeing them for a month dah ni and I dunno how to undo what had just happened in class..

..they're gonna hate me after this kan!

='(    ='(     ='(

Now I have 50++ cupcakes that I dunno what to do with.. =(

And I feel like total crap!

And really regret what happened..

..and I really wanna cry..

P/S
Today is the last Friday before Ramadhan, a time where they say is good for doa. I had prayed for my PhD as well as for quidance in a few things I'm struggling with right now.. I should've also prayed for patience la klau mcm ni.. ="(

Guess where I just came back from?

Hehe.. Around noon, Rashid called to ask me if I wanted to follow him and his housemates s.o.m.e.w.h.e.r.e..

Mane ye?

Heheh.. jeng³!

Akhrinye, setelah bertahun asyik lalu je kat highway tu! <--Okay, cam sgt perak lah Ayu ni kan..

Upon arriving, we had to register as visitors first (Duh.. bese lah tu, Ayu oiii). Had time to snap another picture jugak then haha.. Then we entered..

Ok.. takde la cam gah sgt sebegitu ye, saje je sy kasik kunun cam suspen sbb first time kan masuk kilang itu. Was imagining a padang-pasir-like view.. double duh! 

I also had imagined it was like a super-huge store where you have this big basket to put it the boxes and boxes of kurma you wanted to buy.. tough luck la klau nak dpt camtu kan! Hahah.. actually it was just a small crowded room, with a glass display of only a select few form the long list of items on sale. You were given a list each and on the walls were these large posters of the things on sale. You only had to make you choice on the form given to oyu, then you go right up to there long line of people at the counter to place your order.. and then you pay lah!

Then you wait for a while till they call your number and you go out to pick up your boxes of order.

Done!

Haiyaaaa.. ilang daya imaginasiku kalu begini!

Heheh.. anyway, the dates were sold in bulk la since you bought it at the factory and there were a dozen boxes per package ranging from RM69 to RM200++. You could also buy them per kg if you want where the Kurma Nabi was the most expensive at RM400 per 5kg (tp Rashid kate murah coz at Makkah they sold it at RM80 per half kilogram).

The four of us bought 3 large packages of kurma (1 box of Safina dates and another 2 boxes of Bledi dates). Then since I had told the boys I wanted to buy the chocolate covered kurma (which was sold at RM70 for 5 boxes of 150g), they dgn baik hatinye took one box each so I won't be stuck with the whole 5 boxes hehe.. selamat~~

I also bought this..

..sgt sedap hokey! Bleh lawan my favourite Quality Street nye chocolates wpun choice kurang skit kot ~ chocodate, strawberry flavoured chocs, milk choc, caramel, white truffle, coconut cream, praline and crispy cream) tp seryes sedap. This one you don't have to buy in bulk and at only RM13 je (Quality Street kan mcm RM50 per box!)

All in all, this was my purchase..

..haha, ok, yg chocodate tu mcm tipu la kan since the guys took 3 boxes dah pun and dlm tu just tinggal 2 more boxes je. All those tak sampai RM150 pun tau.. Rasenye RM121 camtu kot.

Tinggal mau distribute je ~ ♥

So sape yg duk dekat² sini, sile²! Especially if you plan to give boxes of dates to friends and family.. we already calculated, you save more than 25% and sgt la bnyk lagi choice than if you buy from your local shops.

Oh yeah.. selamat bersedia utk Ramadhan ye kengkawan ~ ☺

I know I'm getting better when

..I never realized I was singing along (dengan PENUH semangat.. no less!) to Because Love Grows Where My Rosemary Goes in my car until I swtopped at the traffic light and notice the makcik in the kerete sebelah gaping at me while the pakcik was smiling amusedly..

Opsss.. bumi, telanlah sy demi meng'cover' malu sy ini! Hahaha..

..and the goodnights sleep last night didn't hurt either. First time I slept like a baby in these last few weeks!

And finally.. ♥

Today's still Friday, right?

(Err, well, technically la since its not 12.00am yet.. tp klau dalam Islam, udah masuk Sabtu dah ni kan tadi after Maghrib)

Anyway, eversince I've stopped going to school, I've kinda missed wearing my baju kurungs on Fridays.. boley?

Today plak, I had a few things to do (OK, bunyi cam banyak la kunun but only wanted to service my car *huaaaa.. melayang RM285 tadi* then go buy my monthly supplies. Usually for these things, I just put on my old jeans and any available t-shirt but yesterday, I decided to wear my baju kurung..

Oooohhhhh.. SGT ladylike kaaaaannn.. pi service kete then shopping dgn berbaju kurung! =p

Anyway, I hadn't planned on going to Popular since I almost always managed to coax myself in buying something. Still, tarikan sebuah kedai buku adelah satu godaan yg tak pernah dpt sy tolak =p

I told myself I WON'T buy anything..

..but then I saw this!

Yeayyy! Finally setelah bertahun² plan mau membeli, sy dpt jugak beli!

I know, I know.. dah tua bangka pun baru nak beli tafsir kah?

Actually, my first one I bought during my time at AlMashoor dah ilang or something. And frankly, I don't really like that one coz tulisan kecik giler and they only give you the meaning of the verses. The only use we had for it that time was for the daily tadarus every morning at school. Even then, I'd rather go to Abah's tafsir whenever I needed anything. Not that I used it that much kan.. the ignorance of youth!

Nowadays, you've got all sorts of tafsir where most of them even have referances on when and why a particular verse was err.. what the word eh? 'diturunkan'.. combined with the fact that most tafsirs now have larger fonts which makes it easier for you to read both the actual Al Quran verse and its meaning (yg dulu punye, dhommah pun sometimes nmpk like fathah kaaaann!) makes tafsir reading easier..

(I guess age factor pun same kot.. makin tua makin sedar diri sikit nak tau makne ape yg dibace tu hehe.. but not admitting to that in public la kan.. sy kan mude lagik =p)

Last year I bought one for my junior Salleh for him to take to Japan but regretfully, the only tafsir I found then, though gave thorough explanation on verses, had a-bit-too-small-for-my-liking kinda fonts. I would have prefered to buy him a better one (Read: bigger fonts) but couldn't find one anywhere.. aisyy, mmg rezeki Salleh was that one je lah kot..

Then Yun had also told me about this tafsir she was trying to find where instead of a book for the whole AlQuran, it was divided into a few books with tafsir for a few juzu' each but somehow I never found that one too.

So when I came across that one at Popular, which had the just-right kinda fonts and quite adequet explanation, I thought, why not!

(Jugak since I just got my gaji lah jugak kan which was syukur Alhamdulillah la.. klau idak, tangguh beli ape!)

Bagus lah jugak this Ramadhan, I can now not only read my old trustworthy AlQuran I've been using since I was 18, I can also try to understand what I read (instead of just recite je).. and I'm really glad that instead of skipping Popular as I had first planned, 'something' made me go in.

And instead of my novels I keep buying, I've bought something better di ambang Ramadhan ini.. Let's just hope that I'll really be using this tafsir instead of being excited about it for a few weeks then ignoring it kemudian (seperti nasib tafsir zaman sekolahku itu).. Naudzubillah

Err.. well, actually, I did buy a book jugak but I think its appropriate with the coming Ramadhan as well as the purchase of my tafsir yesterday..

Ok, I admit, I felt a bit guilty about buying books at first when I saw this while I was in line to pay for my tafsir. I was already in my car to head back when I just ran up back to Popular to also buy this book. Adik kaunter itu mcm heran je tgk sy dok beratur lagi kooott hehe..

Anyway, since we have less than 10 days in Sya'aban, I'd like to wish everyone a blessed Ramadhan for this year and may all of us become better Muslims while taking advatage of the blessed month ☺

Always a bridesmaid, never THE bride?!?!

I got an sms from my cousin, Sayang, yesterday afternoon stating..

..wait for it..

..wait for it..

..wait for ittttt..

..I'm to be the maid of honour on our other cousin's birthday!

No, it wasn't a request. It was sorta like an order (ok la, 'order' seems harsh here tp saje nak drama lebey hehe..). And by whom?

By mummy dearest as well as the council of Aunties who had held the meeting (I suspect la since I know Mama and Wan Chik went ther after Fatin's solemnization on Sunday) at Tangkak, at mak Yang's house.

Sayang told me she was to be the M.O.H for the reception on our side while I'll be the one on the reception for the bridegrooms side.. and yes, she was 'ordered' too!

The reason: We were the only two eligible nieces of the Council who are still unmarried though we're both in our 30s (ok, pangakuan sekejap je ye.. pasni I'm back to being 16!)

Caiittttttt.. ada kaaaaaaa camtu?!?! Cisssss..

I have my own reasons for refusing which I will present to the Council, IF I have a chance (as if!)

1. I've been the maid of honour for THREE times already.. that I can remember la

• First one to Lin who got married in Kuantan making it also the first experience for me driving all the way up there. I still have the peach and green baju kurung she gave me for the event tho.. ehem.. dah tak brape nak muat kot hahahahaaha..
• Second to my dear old friend (NO, she's NOT old!), Sentot a.k.a Baizurah for the reception on Amin's side. I wore my favourite blue baju kurung then.. AND got the bouquet, tho not caught la.. more like she handed it to me herself ngan harapan ianye akan sgt mujarab =p
• Third, a last minute pengapit to my bestfriend during the Uni years, kak Wahid. I went just to give support during the solemnization but ended up to being the 'bidan terjun' style pengapit. And to think that I was wearing a green suit which was the exact same colour with the hantaran making people joke asking if I was also the hantaran she was giving to her husband.. caiittt! Seb baik akak ku itu sporting bile org ckp camtu.. klau sy, mesti muke dah lain koooottt

So three times the charm.. kah?

Sepatutnye sy dah pencen la kan bab² jadi pengapit ni kaaannn

2. Another thing is, Iskandar already told all of us to find something green for raya (Ada kaa my adik bongsu plak call the shots.. cissss! Terpakse laa nak amik ati kaaaannn =p) So, I'm not gonna waste my money buying 2 new baju kurungs since the one required for the M.O.H. duty is Maroon! Very different colours both at the end of the spectrum la kaaannn..

3. People who know me, also know: Instead of a blushing bride, they'll have a BLUSHING BRIDESMAID on their hands. During Lin's reception, I was soooo afraid and kept looking at the floor the whole time ok.. During Baizurah's time pulak, I actually hid behind the stage during the times I wasn't needed for my duties.. boley? While during kak Wahid's, the photographers, a husband (Apit) and wife (Fisya) team that I know from USM, kept commenting on, "Awat laaa pengapit yg malu niiiii?!?!" and ayat tak leh blah from Apit, "Camne kak Ayu nak kawen ni klau dah jadi pengapit pun dok merah² muke camni?!"

So there! I've got THREE strong reasons for that la kann..

Except, I was reminded that the actual superstition was Three Times A Bridesmaid, Never A Bride. So I've actually shot my chances of being a bride when I agreed to be the last-minute MOH to kak Wahid. So what's a fourth time kan? You can't really break whats already broken!

Hehehe.. ok la. ok la.. I know la its superstition and sgt la khurafat for me to believe.. I saje nak drama lebey je in front of my Aunties tu sumer nnt =p So, I'd better make sure they don't read this hehe..

Aiyaaaa~~ Looks like me and Sayang can't really run away from our duty to our cousin, Fatin (and from the orders of the Council)

So Ndar, takdenye kak Yong nak beli baju kaler ijau tahun ni ye!!

Haisyyy.. better practice my blush-proof face before September, huh?

Mabuk karipaf la sy pasni.. =p~

Being still not quite right in the head yet, I was ready to stay in bed this morning. I would have done so if I didn't have this sudden need for currypuffs..

Huik.. bleh ade sudden need utk karipaf ke? Hahah..

Ok la, the 'sudden need' was yesterday actually so I had bought all the things to make them. It was the WANT of making them that had forced me outta bed..

Hmm.. actually, I have a 'story' about currypuffs I once wrote about here.. haha, cerite di waktu sy jatuh chenta kali pertama dolu yg cam tah pape je Ayu ni kaaaannn.. =p

Anyway, berbalik pade mase skrg ☺

I was fasting so the taste was a challenge la kot kan (mcm la klau tak pose bleh jadik sedap karipaf sy kaaaannnn!).. jap rase garam sikit, jap rase bnyk.. last² redha je.

Since I didn't remember how I had actually done it dulu (Ye, aside form the first time I did it as in the above link, this is the first time I've made it since. Thus, making it the 2nd time I've done them myself, unsupervised. Bleh ka dah umo 31 16 tp baru 2 kali buat sendiri?!?!), I just bantai je the recipe for the filling. One pack of minced beef, 7 small potatoes, 3 onions and a packet of curry powder.. garam se'taktau' rase hehe..

Errr, nampak rupe cam jadik kan?

Next was the pastry. At first, mau tunjuk pandai nye pasal, I did one using my instinct (pbffttttttt!) Just trial mix je pun (Ecehhh.. cam trial mix for concrete lah pulakkk). I tried using the tip someone gave me on using melted shortening for a crispier pastry. Managed to get around 12 kot kat sini but somehow, the other half of my instinct mcm tak suke je this way of making the pastry.. boley?

So the next one I did like dolu jugak lahhh.. and terase sedikit kagum ngan diri sendiri sbb ala² ingt jugak la how to make the pastry wpun dah bertahun tak buat.. boley? Mcm bongok je Ayu ni hahahaha..

Taraaa..

Kunun workspace la.. work in progress lah sgt kaaaannnn..

The first trial of my currypuffs looked like this.

Huuuu.. sgt tebal sy punye kelim tu kan? Adessshhhhhh.. nmpk sgt out of practice kaannn!

Anyway, sib baik I only used half a kg of flour as opposed to 1kg Mama suggested. Mama told me my filling cam bnyk sgt je I made. But somehow the prospect of kneading 1kg of flour sgt tak menarik so I only made half.. sekali, filling tak cukup!

Apekah?

I think I did something wrong sini kot.. just can't put my finger on what is it I did wrong coz as I remember, when we were smaller, we used to make pastry with 1kg flour jugak la when we used 1 pack of minced meat.. Hmm, ape la salah sy buat eh?

Anyway, since the was still around one-third pastry left, I knew I couldn't just throw it away lah kan. Tp sgt la malas wanna go out but some minced meat lagi.. mau pulak today is the pasar malam so confirm la lagi malas wanna go out bersesak² like that kan.

Last², I godek² the freezer to survey my options and settled with some crab sausages and prawns. Tp sbb mcm sikit, I added some chopped mushrooms and potatoes. Masak all of it with some chilli and oyster sauce je sbb takde bende len bleh ku buat masak nye..

..and jugak tambah some slices of cheese in each currypuff.. boley? Pasan wat calzone kah Ayu ni, siap cheese bagai heheh.. ☻

In the end, though I didn't get 100 pieces as Mama predicted, I got jugak la dlm 6 full containers yg cenggini..

Huuu.. nangis nak perabis!

Ade yg 10 hari dok minum petang with currypuffs ni..

And the sad truth is, niat asal making it was for iftar today, tp tak sempat pun nak goreng for iftar.. huwaaaaaaaa~~~

(Tp makan bende bes jugak la for iftar hehe.. something simple but filling!)

Anyway, pictures of the fried currypuffs tadek la ye.. coz all of it is already stored in the fridge and freezer since my iftar meal was quite filling so like buang mase la kan goreng, kang tak makan pulak.. so can't really give my own verdict of my 2nd-time-make-currypuffs-alone.

P/S

While making the currypuffs, I heard the song Sugar² by the Archies and tanpe berfiir panjang I took the rolling pin and made it into a makeshift microphone while nyanyi² keliling dapur dgn semangat. Bile lagu dah abis, tetibe rase bersalah for being happy over a song coz I'm supposed to be sad kan skrg?!?!?

Current Mantra..

 

I'll be fine..

I'll Be Fine..

I'll be fine..

I'll be fine..

I'll Be Fine..

I'll be fine..

I'll Be Fine..

I'll be fine..

I'll be fine..

I'll Be Fine..

I'll be fine..

I'll Be Fine..

I'll be fine..

I'll be fine..

I'll Be Fine..

Transformers?!?! Ke minor makeover je? Hehe..

O-kaaaayyyy! Why the picture of a wee lil' me laughing at the camera?

The last two weeks have been a bit stressful for me, on the state-of-mind part of me. Its still bothering me now but at least I'm starting to get a bit in control of my emotions.

As in a few entries ago, I had written about my tourist-experience-in-my-hometown courtesy of Shahnaz, that was something I think I really needed as things were still fresh in my mind. The 'getaway' provided me the distraction I needed at the moment and I'm very² thankful to The One up above for it.

Anyways, what happened after me and Shahnaz parted ways was a different matter.

I was ready to go back to Pt Buntar when Ikram (and then Iskandar) called asking if I'd like to have lunch with them. Since I was still in Penang, I agreed so I headed back home to Sg Ara.

As I entered the place where I had grown up once upon a time ago, I realized not many things had changed. Afew shops were replaced with some newer ones but I think that was all it. The homwtown I grew up was still recognizable as it was since I was a kid.. I noticed one shop I used to go to once every, lets say, 2 years.. but I continued my drive back home.

At home, Ikram and Iskandar had friends along so I excused myself to perform my Zohor prayers. When Ikram told me he still wasn't finished cooking, my mind wandered back to the shop I had noticed earlier so I decided to go make a visit. The last time I went there was probably 10 years ago.. and I'm guessing my estimate here is quite accurate..

..but the shop was full, much to my disappointment! I went back home and had lunch with Mama and the boys (Ohhhh.. dulu only Iwan and Adi je I call 'the boys'.. now its my younger siblings and their friends!)

As I was ready to go back to PB, I decided to head to the bakery in Sg Ara for some cake fix but somehow, I felt like checking out the shop I had earlier went to and to my delight, there were only two customers in there so there wasn't a long wait.

And what did I do there?!?!

Well, I turned THIS..

..into THIS! Tadaaaaa~~

Okay², obviously those two pictures are not at all like me la kan! I can't really put my pictures coz

1. Aurat weihhhhh

2. I really wanted long wavy and curly hair like that (colour tamau la blonde gitu.. my normal hair clour would do!)

3. Gambo² tu mcm lebih comey je dari realiti diri sy (Ohh, kene la kaver kekurangan diri haha..) especially the short hair one. Why la my hair not like that ahhhh?

My hair was already long enough, right below my butt. The problem with me is that I never know when to cut my hair. When its long enough, I'd complain everytime I wash my hair coz its to much work and it dries VERY slowly due to my thick tresses.. but once their clean and dry, mule la malas nak gi hairdresser kaaaannnn..

I decided, what better time than present to cut my hair?

Who knows, it might ringankan my kepala that was feeling a bit too heavy to handle! Kan.. kaaaaannnnn..

A few customers seperti biase drama lebih than me and the hairdresser plak, asking: Betul ke adik nak potong rambut tu? Tak sayang ke?

One makcik even sat beside me watching the entire process.. boleh gitu?

My head did feel a bit lighter though, and for a while, I imagined that it was lighter due to my problems being blown away..

Yeahhhhh RIGHT!

Hahah..

So, why the connection with my picture at the topmost?

Sbb that picture was taken when I was 2 years old, and that is the last picture I have of myself with hair this short!

I've always cut my hair shoulder length, somehow I have this strange need to still be able to tie up my hair, but this time, I can't even bunch it up, its REALLY short hehe..

..and I still can't recognize the girl I see in the mirror tho' I've had this haircut for two weeks, tomorrow!

No more huge bun under my headscarf!

No more brushing my hair with my big hairbrush.. I can use combs now!

No more worrying if my hair would dry properly before I wear my hijab! I can wash my hair
every time I take a bath now hehe..

..and I could even sometimes feel the breeze going through my hair, cooling my head!

Serius! Sgt kagum okay since I've nver known how soothing it could be..

I'm FREE!!!

Heheh.. well, at least for the next few months la since my hair grows quite faster compared to most of my friends..

So I'm gonna enjoy it as long as I can coz trust me, next time, I'm NEVER GONNA CUT MY HAIR THIS WAY AGAIN!

Aik.. tadi suke sgt rambut pendek, skrg takmo potong camni dah pasni.. why ah?

Coz, as I said earlier, I still don't recognize the girl in the mirror AND, its just not me! I'm a pony-tailed kinda girl, and I'm afraid that every now and then, I get tired of my short hair coz it doesn't feel familiar..

So hair, please grow quickly (especially quickly below my shoulders since my hair seems to be tickling me at the back of neck). I'll wait for you patiently (for a while la before I grom impatient) and my hair brush (that is now banished into the bottom drawer) misses you..

Muaahhh~~

Pukul 3 pagiii~~ ♪ <--tipu, baru kul 2.45am

Saya sangat lah berbau ikan-ish dan udang-ish sekarang!!

Tp sy suke.. sbb? Sy rase hari ni sgt laaaaa produktif wpun sy bangun sgt giler lambat arini

Ehh.. Iklan jap! Ari Isnin (ke Selase ntah) aritu merupekan episode Hari Ini Dlm Sejarah buat sy sbb sy berjaye mengupas durian pertama sy! Selame 31 16 tahun hidup ni, selalu org len je yg tolong kupaskan tp di hari yg permai itu, SY KUPAS SENDIRI! Percaye tak? <--Okay, cm sgt over la pulak budak Ayu ni..

Okay, sambung balik..

Siang tadi, setelah beberape hari membasuh langsir (yg sebenarnye sudah kering pade hari sy basuh jugak.. opppssss!), akhirnye sy berjaya meyakinkan diri sy yg sy cukup rajin untuk memasang langsir tersebut kembali! Maka, sudah tertutup lah kembali tingkap sy yg pecah ituuuu (Opppsss, lagi!)

Siang tadi jugak, sy telah berjaya menghabiskan sisa² akhir kerja² penyusunan buku² sy hehe.. boley? Minggu lepas start, minggu ni baru siap, Ayu? Ohhh, sungguh 'rajin' sy kan.. Sekarang, sudah tiade lagi buku² sy yg berserakkan di atas lantai, di tepi katil, di meja makan dan sebagainye kerane semuanye sudah sy susun di rak² sy yg baru dan lame itu. Seronok, okay!

Tapi..

Sy ingt buku sy banyak sangat. Sbbnye, rak² sblm ni pun tidak dpt menampung buku² sy (sbb tu la sy gedik beli rak baru hari tu kaaannn!) Tp rupenye, bile sy dah susun kesemua buku² sy, sy dapati masih terdapat ruang untuk.. hmm.. satu.. dua..

Tiga..

Empat..

Hmm.. Lima?!?!

Lima buku koooooooottttttttt!

Ape patut sy buat?

Hmmm.. terpakse la pegi Popular beli buku baru kan? Heheh.. sgt tak sedar diri kan padahal sedang menunggu lagi 4 buah buku dari The BooksGalore yg sy dah pesan bulan lepas. Itu pun nasib baik sy dah tutup FB sy buat sementara ni, klau tak, mesti sy rase mcm TERpakse pergi ke pautan untuk The BooksGalore atau Penjaja Buku kan.. kannnnn

Ohh.. lupe pule! Sy jugak telah berjaya mengemop (ade ke perkataan ni?) bilik belajar sy itu (Bilik belajar la sangaaaaaaaaatttt.. lebih kepade STOR BUKU shj!) setelah beberape tahun.. err, bulan.. tidak melakukan aktiviti tersebut. Maka, bilik ini sudah boleh digunekan dgn selese kembali.. yeayyy!

Petang tadi pule, sedang sy bersiap mahu ke pasar malam, kedengaran tepon sy berbunyi menandekan rezeki hari Jumaat sudah masuk hehe.. nak tau ape sy dpt? Tadaaaa~~

TQ Abg Azahar.. ni boleh simpan sampai raye ni, bukan senang nak dpt kek rasmi Sarawak ni! Tp mcm sedikit ragu² je, sempat ke nak simpan sampai raye, takut blum sempat bulan pose pun dah abis kooottt.. oppssss! Ohh, tak leh. tak leh.. paling tidak simpan ke bulan pose buat jamu kwn² mase berbuke, sebarkan sikit pahale org yg kasik, ye tak?

Tapi.. laratkah anda nak buat jamuan bukak pose ni, Ayu?!?!

Di pasar malam, sy dpt membeli sayur²an, udang dan sotong. Sgt tidak dpt digambarkan perasaan sy bile lihat peti sejuk sy penuh di bahagian simpanan sayur ituuuuuu <--nmpk sgt ruang tu sgt jarang laaaa diisi kaaannnn

Balik ke rumah, sy mule menyiang dan membersihkan barangan yg dibelikan.. tetibe mcm perasan rajin la kan, klau tidak, sblm ni dgn plastik² bungkusan tu sy campak di bahagian sejuk beku <--dasar M!

Kemudian mase untuk ke kelas.. TAPI, sblm tu sy sempat singgah Econsave untuk mencari ikan sbb mase dok perasan rajin menyiang udang sotong segale sambil teringt sayuran yg bnyk itu, sy teringat ikan kukus kak Shima yg sedap~~

Rindu pulak kat kakak² sy tu dulu (Ishhh.. sedey tetibe)

Maka, bile balik rumah semule, sy menyambung menyiang udang (ye, sy buat keje ngan lembap!) termasuk la ikan yg baru dibeli sambil berlari ke ruang TV sekali sekale untuk melayan 2 buah muvi dia TV3 dan RTM2 tadi hehe..

Sbb tu la pukul 2.30am baruuuuuu la siap semua keje² tu..

..dan sbb tu la sy rase sy bau cam ikan dan udang skrg!

Sib baik sy tido sorg, klau tak, dah kene halau dari katil dah gamaknye hehe..

Dan skrg baru sy nak rase mengantuk.. tp sy nak mandi dulu kasik wangi sblm tido wpun tido sorg!

Ye, entri ni mcm tah pape.. tp sy seronok sbb rase mcm sgt terisi hari sy hari ni. Kan seronok klau hari² sy bleh rase hari tersisi camni.. tak payah la sy nak pk pasal bende yg sy tanak pk tu kaaannn.. kaaaannn..

='(

FB Ayu M.I.A?!?!

Assalamualaikum

Dear Friends who've been concerned..

You won't know how it made me feel when you guys asked why I was missing from FB.. and I thought no one would notice! Not la that it was a flag for attention pun kan.. dah deactivate FB, mau attention mcm mana, right? But you guys made me feel that you cared, and I really appreciate that right now..

And for those who've asked, yes, I will activate my FB again one day (which I hope would be in the very near future since I DO feel that sometimes this is the only place I get to know about updates from you guys, especially the ones far away from me)

Its just that I'm in a sorta rough patch right now. I need to sort out a few things and sort out my feelings too. I've always thought of myself as a secretive person (klau tak, idak le cume kwn² je yg tau pasal my blog ni wpun dah bertahun I've been writing in this) but with FB, I realize that I tend to share almost everything.

From boring and mundane things like when I'm stuck in the traffic jam (and suprised that I could experience it HERE in Pt Buntar) to the times I win stuff on the radio/online to the times of my encounter with the horrific Mr K haha.. to things that happen in my classes and the list goes on.

I just don't think I'm ready to be defeated by my impulse to share everything (sometimes without even realizing it) especially in time like these. Tau la kaaaan, nak update status or gambo in FB bkn susah sgt pun. Don't hafta go online pun, its just an sms/MMS away je punnnn.. tu yg kadang² tidak berape sedar sgt what I share on my wall..

Hahah.. boley gitu?!?

Thats why, for a while, I'm going in hiding.. not because I hate you guys. I love you guys especially for making me feel that someone (or a bunch of someoneS like the whole lot of you~♥) would go search for me if I ever get lost one day <--Okay, sgt DRAMA!

I'd only planned on going away for a week, but my emotions the other day were still quite jumbled up so I decided to take a longer 'vacation' for a while, so yeah..

..at least for a while!

But still, to all of you've who've cared enough to ask (you know who you are though most of you don't even know my blog), thanx for making me feel not totally worthless as I had initially felt at the beginning of my 'vacation'. You guys are the best and may Allah grant you happiness a thousand time over as what you have made me feel.

I love you guys! ~ ♥

Wassalam

With love from,

~Ayu~

..=(

I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset.. I'm not upset..