Bile 1st time accident~

This has got to be among the worst days of my life kot.. though it only became the said 'one-of-the-worst' around 5pm this afternoon.

I was on my way to Honeys for some last minute cookie-ingredient purchase and had planned to go to the Sg Bakap bazaar for my iftar. I was THiS close to achieving my target.. =(

On the way, I was observing the windy day and remembering how it felt like to go kite flying with my brothers. Maybe it was because I was to engrossed in the memory, or maybe because I was glad of the rather cold day in exchange to a few hot ones with had this much.. I guess I wasn't thinking much when I went through this junction.

It was my fault, I was on the minor road but I had looked both ways to see the only car moving was still quite far away so I just pushed the accelerator without realizing the moving car was also doing the same thing.. and since he was driving a Perdana V6, guess what happened?

I quickly pulled up my car to the nearest curb, and tho I knew my car was in trouble, I was more concerned on the other guys car coz it was plainly my fault.

Okay.. so sy kene maki.. and I deserved it.

He forced me to go see at what had happened to his car so I went tho I knew I would never understand all those parts he was talking about. The only thing I herad was, "Sy cat tu pun RM5 000, baru siap semalam.."

Dan sekali lagi sy kene sumpah.. but I deserved it.

I kept saying I was sorry tho I knew 'sorry' doesn't make everything better at all.. as what he told me after I told him I was sorry and admitted to my mistake.

Then he went to everyone who had come around us saying the same thing over and over again and I felt like such a loser that I didn't realized I was shaking all over until and kindly Indian Uncle came up to me and asked me if I was okay. I tried clenching my fist as not to show how much I was trembling.

And once again they guy came up to me, he deserved to be angry, telling me dia nak balik jauh la (Sg Petani), dia dah abis bnyk duit kat kereta dia la (mmg nmpk cam bermodify bagai), was I blind kah (Okay, that hurt, but it WAS my fault) and he demanded I paid him RM550 for the towing cost from here to Sg Petani..

Fine, it was an understandable demand.. but I'm not exactly what they say as, 'cap duit' here. I tried telling him that I'm only a student whose only source of income is from my tuition classes but he didn't wanna listen and kept asking everyone to tell me to pay up by giving examples to them such as, "Klau dia langgar kete korg pun korg buat mcm tu jugak kan?"

Finally,  those people took me away from that guy and asked me to just wait by my car and not to go near that guy as he's still angry.. tp dia pulak ikuuuuuuttt sy smpi ke kete.. aduh!

I didn't realize how upset I was until out of no where, kak Ros (a fellow tuition teacher) came up beside me and asked what happened..

..it was then that sy yg cube nak macho just broke down unexpectedly!

Seriously, you don't think I wasn't upset do you?

I've had my license for 11 years now and not once have I been even in a minor accident. I'm not the most careful driver, but I think I do my best. Yes, I've had speeding tickets but only on highways, never on federal roads.

On top of that, I was all alone. All my friends had gone home for the raya holidays (even Puga!) and the only person here I could rely on before doesn't wanna be my friend anymore..

..and thinking about the cost the guy had demanded me to hand over to him made me shudder coz the pay I just received last week was to be stretched into to months expediture since there were no classes for Ramadhan, thus no pay for next month!

I.felt.so.lonely

I really didn't wanna cry. I didn't want that guy to think I was the kinda girl who'd ask for sympathy through tears (and NO! I'm not one of those.. I'm just a lame crybaby even dari dulu, not because I wanted to 'pancing' some sympathy.. my friends could vouch for that but would he know?!) but when I heard kak Ros asking me softly how I was, I couldn't stop myself..

It felt so bad when the guy talked to me as if I was this lousy driver who met with accidents every other day and who, since I knew I was wrong, I couldn't even defend myself coz I didn't wanna sound whiny. And it felt so stupid when I started crying tho I was trying my best to hide it by looking at the other direction all the time while discreetly trying to wipe the tears that just wouldn't stop falling.

God.. sometimes I wish I was more the defensive kinda person.. just to shut the person up!

I know I was wrong, but just because I rushed outta my car to apologize, didn't mean that I could take all that. I'm sure if I was more defensive, went out of my car and instead of apologizing, tried to point out his fault jugak, defensively I mean, mesti dia pun takde la melampau sgt kot nak kate kat sy mcm tu. Ni, mmg terpakse dengar and terime je ape dia nak cakap =(

..sedih tau!

And I didn't know WHERE to ask for help.

The people from the workshop told kak Ros to take me to the police station to file a report and back in kak Ros's car, I just let myself cry without trying to hide it anymore.

Ye, memang la sy sy salah.. memang sy deserve pun org tu ckp mcm² kat sy.. I just wish I could.. could ape? Ntah.. just wished it never happened..

At the police station, I told the police about what happened and they took the report (which somehow made me smile a bit through it when they told me NOT to say it was my fault) coz I kept insisting that it was.. depe pun penat kot dengar haha..

I really didn't know what to do, I had to ask the police what was the normal procedure and all that because that guy kan mntk me bg RM550 tu jugak² kat dia and when I went out, he wasn't around the police station so I didn't know how (or where I was gonna find the money) to pay him. I also didn't know how do you claim from your insurance or what was actually covered and all that.

But then I saw the guy from the workshop and since the police (Sarjan Nazri who was very kind) couldn't help me much there coz they didn't know much beyond the police report, I was kinda glad to see him. Nathan nama dia and he told me to bring a photocopy of the car grant, car insurance, my i/c and driving license to the workshop tomorrow. When I told him I didn't have any transport to go there, he was kind enough to offer to come and get it from me. Selamat tak yah nak pk call taxi ke ape ke coz number taxi stand tu pun sy dah tak simpan sejak² pakai kete..

..and it also turned out that they had asked kak Ros to send me to the ploce station just to get me away from that guy who had kept demanding at least RM550 there and then tu. I just hope they didn't do it out of pity (which I really hope was the case after Nathan made a face and told me to ignore it when I told him I had to pay the guy the money he wanted) I don't think I can stand any pity here.. =(

In the end, I asked help from Mat as I suddenly remembered about him. Thankfully, since his mother is staying with him at the moment, he didn't have to go back to Kulim for raye.. I felt a bit guilty for asking help from him as his house was on the opposite direction so he had to come pick me up mcm jauh la jugak kot but I'm glad he wanted to help me coz it turned out, taxi susah giler nak dapat from the police station in Jawi tu. He had offered to take me to the bazaar as I hadn't had a chance to buy anything for iftar but at that time, my appetite had gone AWOL and I wasn't really in the mood to be in a public place. I also didn't want to trouble Mat more so I just asked if he could send me home..

..so here I am now, in front of the computer with a grumbling tummy which suddenly decides to go hungry and a major headache. I do not even want to start thinking of whats gonna happen, how much I'm gonna have to pay or the perils of being without my dear, loyal PFK..

Hope you guys will have a WAY better end-of-Ramadhan-early-Syawal than me..

5th Challenge ~ A Song That Reminds You Of Someone

So as I'm still pening from paying all those things I have to pay and wondering where the hell did some of my money go to (Nope! Haven't even bought anything for myself yet!), I decided to look up the next song challenge ☺

Day 05 ~ A Song That Reminds You of Someone

Okay.. who does this song remind me of? Errr, well.. errr.. hmmm..

Lets put it short. This is one of the many songs IM gave me which I really liked. At that point, I hadn't heard it on the radio yet so it was kinda like a new song for me.. which I listened to over and over again. The lyrics are so meaningful ~ ♥

Ok, tamau sambung the story (hahaha..). Enjoy!

LeAnn Rimes ~ I Believe In You

You breathe and life begins

You speak and my world makes sense

That's how it is when it comes to you

Your mercy has no end

You're more than just a friend

It amazes me you feel the way you do

I believe in you and nothing less

I believe in you
Can't help myself

You're all the hope the reason that I need
I believe in you just because

I don't need no one to prove your love

From all that I have seen

It's easier for me to believe in you

You are so beautiful

You are the miracle

That drys the tears, heals the wounded heart

And it's so clear to see

Your hand in everything

You were there for me, there to see me through no

I believe in you and nothing less

I believe in you
Can't help myself

You're all the hope the reason that I need

I believe in you, yeah, just because
I don't need no one to prove your love

From all that I have seen

It's easier for me to believe in you

Through the fire and through the rain

I know your love for me would never ever change

I believe in you and nothing less

I believe in you
Can't help myself

You're all the hope the reason that I need

I believe in you just because
I don't need no one to prove your love

From all that I have seen

It's easier for me to believe in you and nothing less

I believe in you I can't help myself

You're all the hope the reason that I need no no yeah

I believe in you
Just because I don't need no one to prove your love

From all that I have seen
It's easier for me to believe in you

no no yeah to believe in you no oh yeah

No Wonder I'm Not An Accountant!!

I was texting with Baizurah about her Diaper Cake I had ordered for Remy when something hit me..

I might be a good Maths teacher (Good!?!? Perasan alert! Perasan alert! Hahah..) but I really suck in accountings.. specifically in my own household accounting which always drives me crazy!

Instead of getting my pay at the end of the month like normal people, I get mine in the middle of the month, memang usually on the 15th la. This is usually since parents only pay their kids fee at the end of the month (coz normal people get their pay then.. know what I mean?) so the tuition clerks could only calculate our cut of the pay AFTER most of them have paid since we only our pay based on who pays or not for our individual classes.

And like other normal people who start wishing payday would come quicker at the middle of the month, I also have days like that which usually fall on the first few days of the month pulak, for the likes of people like me.

So usually to take my mind off the, "Bile nak gaji ni?" thought, I'd list down all the neccessities I'd need to pay/buy for the next paycheck.

Eg.
1. House rent
2. Mobile & broadband bill
3. Utilities bills
4. Duit Kut
5. Study loan
6. Household items
7. Bla.. bla.. bla..

In doing this, I have this rough figure of what I HAVE to put aside yg WAJIB laaa dibayar kannnn.. and more often that not, I'm left with cukup² je for my daily expenses, tuition expenses and petrol. During this phase, I'm usually happily patting my back for a good job done..

UNTIL I get the actual gaji!

Since my pay isn't, like, tetap.. you know, some months you get this much, other months you get that much (but lucky for me, usually memang cover the WAJIB ones).. its usually a challenge for me to make sure the leftover money is used wisely.. which usually means trouble for me!

Hahah..

..and I'm not the shopping type pulak tu.. well, except if I find myself within a 2km radius of a bookstore je la kot.

And another problem is when I have some things I can only pay by hand (eg. house rent, kut) while some I pay thru CiMBClicks (all three bills, study loan, transfers) so it is here that my problem arises. My mind get all muddled when I have to merge my have-to-pay list with the CiMB/in-hand list..

Yes, I know.. simple household accounting only includes addition and subtraction, right? Tu pun bley salah² ke Ayu oiiiiii~~

Haiyaaa.. this months punye budget I've already calculated THRRE times and still not only tak balance, but I also get different values of the balances EVERY TIME! Huwaaaaaaa~~

It doesn't help that aside from 3 kenduris (Tepet, Anim and Fatin) this month, I'm also budgeting for a baby present (thus, my conversation with Bai.. but you guys gotta see her work, seryes cantik weiiihhhhh.. you can go see them --> here!)

And its the month of raya where my petrol+touchngo budget must be a bit higher than usual.. along with raya goodies budget. Like right now, in my first and third budget list, it seems like I could pretty much cover the needs.. but you just wait till the time comes when I actually have to go buy/pay those thing.. mesti jadik haywire punye lahhhh.. aiyaaaa! Wa manyak pening, loooo..

..and I haven't even started paying anything yet!

Arrrghhh.. I need a CHEAP (most preferably FREE) accountant please! (C'mon la, its just a household account, bkn ribu riban nye account hokay)

Anyone?

Pleaseeeeeeeee..

10 years ago.. to the date!

10 years ago, to the date, was his 21st birthday.

As usual, I was among the first to wish him. I had given his birthday card to Dayah for her to pass to him (as usual haha..) and when he received it, he text me about it.

That afternoon, he told me that his housemates planned to go celebrate his birthday at Pizza Hut (mase tu mane ade Pizza Hut in Pt Buntar.. you had to go to Megamall for the nearest pizza joint) and jokingly asked if I wanted to go along.. KNOWING full well that I won't coz

i. Housemates dia of course la semua lelaki.. segan lahh
ii. I didn't really go out that much those days.. prefered to stay in my room *though not for the sake of studying la jugak)
iii. Since we don't talk that much outside of our emails, I didn't really know what I'd do if I had to talk face to face with him hahah..

I forgot all about it till that night when he text me that night telling me he had bought some pizza for me and Lin along with a big slice of his birthday cake. Since he stayed outside at Taman Pekaka instead of the hostel, it was agreed that Din (one of his closest friends who was also my coursemate) would stop by the girls hostel to send the food to me.

Around 10pm, Din called to tell me he was waiting at the parking lot so I donned my sweater and hijab and went down to meet him.

Dari jauh Din dah sengih and I knew something was up..

As I neared him, his grin turned Chesire Cat-like and I was like, "What?!?!"

Din: Ohh.. cube bgtau kat sy, kenape dia suruh sy kasik ni kat awak je?

Me: Mane de.. sy ni gi makan skali ngan Lin lah ni..

Din: Tp dia sebut name awak sorg je..

Me: *silently cursing IM for his idiocy.. dah tau budak ni suke suspect bkn².. pi cari pasal camtu sape suruh?*

Din: Jawab cepat, kalau tak sy tak bg *smbil sengih nmpk gigi yg bakal je berterabur klau I was a boxer!*

Me: Hishh.. mane ade la.. dia saje la nak share. Kitorg kan baik ngan dia..

In the end, tak larat nak bergaduh ngan Din, I just took the box from his motorcycle and started to head back upstairs when he called me again.. Once again I was like, "Whaaatttt?" (tapi kali ni keras skit kot sbb tak larat nak layan)

Din: Dia suruh sy kasik satu bende lain jugak kat awak..

Me: Ape dia?

Know what he handed to me?

A RING!

I burst out laughing, which then wasn't how I usually acted.

Bongok tul budak ni.. punye nak korek nye, sanggup dia pinjam cincin sape² ntah..

Me: Awak ingat sy tatau ke ape awak nak buat ni, Din oiiiiiii. Sudah² la nak korek citer kitorg, kitorg kawan baik je pun.. takde lebey²!

..and then I left Din without even looking back.. Tak mau menggalakkan lagi suspicion dia.

I didn't tell him about what Din had done, but the next day he frantically smsed me apologizing for what Din had done. He had no idea.

I told him not to worry. I know him and he knows me. We were good friends.. bestfriends even. Close enough that we'd never fall in love with each other.. ever!

Guess the joke was on us then, huh?

Or at least, only on me..

 ~ Happy birthday, IM! ~

4th Challenge ~ A Song That Makes You Sad

Hmm.. Today I was expecting a bit 'mendung'ness in my mood.. but somehow, I didn't! ~ ☺

Not that hari ni is like giler happy ke ape ke.. but more like indifferent. So I guess I have changed a lot, huh..

Still, I think this song is appropriate for what I had felt before.. and not only because of the date. So..

4th Challenge ~ A Song That Makes You Sad

I love this song.. though its kinda heartbreaking jugak kot hahah.. and I love Shania Twain, great singer! Good combination, I think =p

IM liked her too.. he had given me a few of her songs, but not this one. This one I found and liked on my own.. aci? Hahah..

Hmm.. how to describe eh.. I guess the obvious reason why I say this song makes me sad is because it somehow reflected what I felt. Yeahh, I know that they always say, "You can always find a song that suits what you're feeling!"

Well, this was mine..

Enjoy! ♥

It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing ~ Shania Twain

Hope life's been good to you since you've been gone
I'm doin' fine now, I've finally moved on
It's not so bad, I'm not that sad

I'm not surprised just how well I survived
I'm over the worst, and I feel so alive
I can't complain.. I'm free again

[Chorus:]
And it only hurts when I'm breathing
My heart only breaks when it's beating
My dreams only die when I'm dreaming
So, I hold my breath
To forget

Don't think I'm lyin' 'round cryin' at night
There's no need to worry, I'm really all right
I've never looked back--as a matter of fact

[Repeat Chorus]

It only hurts when I breathe

Mmm, no, I've never looked back--
as a matter fact

[Repeat Chorus]

Hurts when I'm breathing
Breaks when it's beating
Die when I'm dreaming
It only hurts when I breathe

Cookie dough Pt.2

Alaaa.. lupe la pulok amik gambo the vanilla cookie dough.. aisshh..

Anyways..

Once again I couldn't sleep so I decided to finish up with my Ramadhan project. This time I made the same cookies as last year, the vanilla one.

So.. kelentang.. kelentung.. kelentang.. kelentung..

Siappppp..

Err.. lebey kurang half of the batch la. Sbb using royal icing ni I usually only bake it in 2 batches shj sbb nak minimumkan mase cookies kat luar.. takut masuk angin (since kene ade addition cooling time for the royal icing to set kan)

So, these are where they'd be placed.. mcm nak campur both flavours je in one container..

And this would be put on top ~ ☺

Hahah.. ye la, sy tak kreatip.. tiap tahun dok motip ketupat je kaaann =p

I'm a fan of cookie dough ~ ♥

These past few days I've been busy (and 'brokenhearted') with my annual Ramadhan Project.

Why broken hearted? Hehe.. mengade kan.. actually I'm a bit frustrated je kot with the initial outcome ni..

Lets see, a few years ago, my Ramadhan project consisted of chocolate covered dates I ordered from Ellie D'Heart. Dia punye serius sedap.. Sedap enough that I ordered it from her year after year hehe.. The almond stuffed inside the date was oh-so-crunchy and the chocolate had just the right bitterness to team with the sweeteness of the date. I liked it enough that I felt sgt rugi order skit².. thus, I started to bulk order from her and give to my friends around here.. just so they could enjoy this sweet delicacy..

But since Yusoff Taiyoob pun dah start jual kurma chocolate, it didn't seem quite special anymore.. at least for me to give people la. So, last year, instead of my usual chocolate covered dates with almond/apricot (Yup, Ellie buat apricot sekali..), I decided to give something different.. Specially made sugar cookies from mah own kitchen! ~ ☺

Okay, mcm la sedap sgt kan.. but at least I knew my friends tak leh dpt kat tmpt len kaaaannn hahah..

This year plak, I had initially planned something different, tp kekangan masa dan kewangan menyebabkan sy kembali ke idea last year. But since I still wanted to make something different, instead of the vanilla sugar cookies I did last year, I decided to go with chocolate flavoured ones..

..yeah! Besaq sgt la difference nye kan Ayu oiiiiii~~

So a few days ago, you could find me mixing up my first batch of cookie dough..

..chocolatey, righhhhhtttt!

Alas, it was here that I was broken hearted.

For one, it was sweet (but turned out my tastebuds yg tak betoi since I don't really take a lot of sugar anyway hehe..)

And second, it wasn't crunchy.. more like towards the soft side, almost like a cake. And I swear it wasn't because I left it out to cool for a tad bit too long.

So the leftover cookie dough was wrapped and kept in the fridge while I wallowed in self-pity <--SANGAT drama kaaannnnnn

Then this morning, once I again I couldn't sleep.. and by 'morning', I meant 1am.

Tossing and turning, it suddenly came to me, that maybe I didn't bake them long enough. You see, for vanilla cookies, you could sorta guess when its baked at the right duration, due to the darkening colour. But for chocolate cookies, how the hell are you supposed to know, right? <--actually, org terre tau je.. Ayu ni bkn nak ngaku tak terre!

I mean, my first try wasn't like not cooked or something. It was thoroughly cooked, just maybe not as much as I'd like so instead of the 10 minutes suggested by the recipe, I did it at 20 minutes.. and tadaaaa~~

I got my just-right crunchy cookies.. yeay!

This time, I wasn't taking any chances so I frosted them as soon as possible and switched on the fan at full speed so the icing would harden more quickly (Ye ke? Hahah..) And voilaaaa~~

Presenting this years giveaway for my Ramadhan Project..

..okay! Still a bit too sweet for my taste la kot so next time I'll just reduce the sugar amount by a tablespoon or two perharps?

P/S
Ohh.. oooohhh.. presenting also, my caramelized apple tak jadi hehe..

Takpe, arini leh try lagi.. but need to go buy some cinnamon coz I used my last stick yesterday. Wish me luck!

3rd Challenge ~ A Song That Makes You Happy

So we've got 15 minutes to iftar and since I haven't shut down the pc, thot I'd do the next song challenge.

3rd Challenge ~ A Song That Makes you Happy!

This song was nicknamed 'Lagu Chick-A-Boom Ayu' by abg Fadzil when I kept repeating this song on my player during my MSc thesis correction period. I dunno why, tp hearing this song makes me smile haha.. no matter how I was feeling at the specicfic moment..

..mcm chumel, hokey, lagu ni!

Memang sgt Chick-A-Boom la kot hehe.. and even till now, I still love it!

(Mau plak arini mengalami kekecewaan in the cookies-making department.. and trus to what abg Fadzil and Choong told me.. bile dgr lagu ni mesti sy sengih balik! Hehe..)

P/S

Oh, the actually video clip memang ade.. tp tak sesuai untuk bln Ramadhan ini ~ ☺ So I chose that clip instead ~ ☻

If Thats Okay With You ~ Shane Ward

I love the way that you look without your make-up
I had a girl before we met but we broke up
There's something 'bout you that makes me want to step up
Step up and be with you
If that's OK with you
We'll keep the neighbours awake too late, too late
'cause I'm gonna make you feel so good how I see it's happening
We'll keep the neighbours awake too late, too late
'cause baby I wanna step up and be with you
If that's OK with you

[Chorus]
I'm gonna make you feel like you are heaven on earth
I'm gonna saint your mother just for giving you birth
I'm gonna wanna hold you in my arms when you cry
If that's OK with you
If that's OK with you

I wanna keep your toothbrush at my apartment
Make a second set of keys and ask you to move in
I'm not crazy
I know what I'm getting myself in
I wanna live with you
If that's OK with you

[Chorus x2]
I'm gonna make you feel like you are heaven on earth
I'm gonna saint your mother just for giving you birth
I'm gonna wanna hold you in my arms when you cry
If that's OK with you
If that's OK with you
If that's OK with you
If that's OK with you
Yeah, yeah

We'll keep the neighbours awake too late too late
I wanna love you this way that way this way
We'll keep the neighbours away too late too late
I wanna love you this way that way this way

[Chorus x2]

Terkenang saat itu.. Pt2

Actually, I had planned to write about my Ramadhan experience during forms 4 and 5, when I was no longer staying in the hostel, but I remembered a few things I had left outta the previous entry..

Only 2 things came to mind when I think about it hehe..

1st ~ Cerite laksa

As I has said earlier, after Tarawikh, we usually had a moreh-like supper with all sorts of heavier-than-usual food. One that stood out to me was laksa.

Now, I'm not really a fan of laksa, but I don't mind eating it. The best way to describe my feelings towards laksa is 'indifferent'.. except when it was this laksa from a pakcik who sold it by bicycle la.. dia punye laksa mmg kelas! I remember one time Mama had ask me to call out to the pakcik s he cycled along our house to buy some laksa. I was waiting when he asked me, "Chek nak otak udang tak?"

I.was.offended!

Why, sbb I thought he was calling ME 'otak udang' (Malay proverb for someones who's 'slow'!) haha.. sian pak cik tu. Panic dia bile tgk muke sy nak nangis time tu hahaha.. Oppss, back to my Ramadhan tale. Though I'm not a big fan of laksa (klau ade, sy makan la.. tp klau takde, idak le sy nak gi cari), I realized that most Penangites really love laksa. Take for instance our canteen. Pak Cik Mat's laksa sold like hot cakes. For laksa alone, he had this really huge pot for the laksa gravy.. I loved the gravy but only ate it for bihun kuah laksa (Haaa, budak² Mashoor mesti ramai tau this favourite kan ~ ?)

So imagine how happy most of the hostelites were when the moreh for the night was laksa.

It was on one of these days that I went to the dining hall with one of my budak kamar.. don't remember who lah.. Aida ke Azimah ke Mawar ke.. hmm.. sape eh?

We sat in front of two Form 3 seniors.. kak Naca and her friend, kak No'en kot klau tak silap and both of them were really enjoying their laksa while us Form 1 junior ala² segan nak makan depan senior.

Tgh² makan tu, suddenly kak Naca asked us, "Sedap tak?", so my friend answered, "Sedappp, kak!"

Then kak Naca turned to kak No'en and asked her the same question, to which kak No'en also answered like my friend..

"Korang tau tak ape rahsia laksa yg sedap?"

To which, hati kecil sy berkata, I don't think I wanna hear this hahah..

So, kak Naca went on to say, instead of using flakes of fish meat, they used old newspapers that were soaked in water until they turned into pulp.. thats why the gravy that night was sgt pekat!

Though I knew she was pulling our legs, my appetite suddenly went AWOL.

Then she continued saying that the dark colour of the gravy was made from old unwashed socks (Okay, ni cam bleh byg la kan sbb kaler mmg agak seropa!) and she made gestures of wringing some old socks into the gravy siap ngan mimik muke yg tak tahan tuuu..

Di kale itu, sy trus tolak pinggan laksa sy ke tepi..

..and to be frank, I didn't eat any laksa until I was in my 20s hahah.. kak Naca nye pasal lah ni

2nd ~ Cerite kad raye

Dari dulu lagi sy mmg jenis org yg suke kasik kad raye.. but when I was in form 2 and form 3, we took the 'kad raya' giveaway a bit too far.. well, as far as the objective we had in mind la..

In form 1, some of my classmates had given raya cards to teachers who don't teach our class, like Cikgu Pah. I was a bit afraid of her and tho I'm the letter/card-sending kinda person, sy takde la kasik kat org yg takde kene ngene sgt ngan sy. However, towards the end of Ramadhan, we realized that these teachers don't reply our card (duhh.. of course la jarang ade yg nak reply) BUT, they 'replied' with duit raya..

Jeng³..

You can guess the rest la kot..

We had identified these duit-raya giving teachers (among them Cikgu Pah, Cikgu Nab, PO) so when we were in form 2, Operasi Duit Raya was put into motion haha..

You can see how tamak we were. I mean, Cikgu Nab already given us duit raya during the fireworks night at the hostel kan.. tp naaaaaaaaakk jugak kasik kad kat dia. Imagine, ONE card tu sampai 10 org kot sign.. and all who signed, dpt duit raye hokey. This project ws only aimed to the teachers yg sebegitu and I'm sure we got around 5 teachers kot yg camni.

It didn't help that our class teacher was Ustaz Rushaidi a.k.a Ustaz Shai. We loved him simply because he was so kindhearted and it was easy to bully him. Bkn la bully cam bangang style.. more like once a month, ade je yg mntk Ustaz Shai belanja.. and know what, thats what he did. He'd come to our class later, telling us to go to the canteen and tell pak cik Mat we were from class 2 Melati and our food would be paid by him.. and we did this almost every month.. giler manje ahh kitorg ngan Ustaz Shai time tu hehe.. dlm kelas pun we could korek² his love life (which, rumour was, at that time was with a pretty senior in our school.. err, kot! Hahah.. sile jgn marah Ustaz kitorg.. dia baik hokey!) sampai malu² dia.. and he's lefthanded, like me! <--Tp sy tak pandai B.Arab pun jugak haha..

So that year, we also got duit raya from Ustaz Shai (without the card trick) but some of us (me included) decided to see what he'd do if we sent him a raya card.. and voila, we got another packet of duit raya.. waaaaa, nakal giler kan kitorg.. amik kesempatan pulak hahah..

We did this until form 3 even though Ustaz Shai no longer taught us and masih la dia melayan student² mengade dia ni heheh.. Naik form 4 and form 5, most of my friends who were in the Operasi Duit Raya gang had moved to other schools. The only ones left were me and Ami je la kot. so maybe sbb dah takde gang, or maybe sbb kitorg dah MATANG (lah sangaaaaaaat!!) sikit, we no longer did the trick. In fact, nak anto kad raye ngan ikhlas pun macam dah malu.. boley?

3rd ~ Salam Jemaah

Ohhhhhh.. I said two things je kan come in mind? Actually, another one just popped up. It was the Salam Jemaah done on the last day of school before the raya holidays (actually, we also do this on the last day of school, but thats another story sbb yg Ramadhan punye lagik spesel.. and you'd see why in a while).

AlMashoor is quite a small school. We only have a total of around 500 students from form 1 to the Upper Sixth form so Salam Jemaah was easy to do. We usually did it after the morning assembly and it'll start with the first formers yg akan salam teachers first, then come up to the seniors.

This was the time kot nak mntk maaf salah ape² ke yg selame ni malu nak ckp, coz no matter if you want it or not, you memang kene salam with THE WHOLE SCHOOL (except male teachers la where we'd just apologize for our cheekiness haha.. and wish them a great holiday ahead). Mase ni jugak la seniors nak usik² juniors ke with imaginary faults just to make the juniors apologize dgn lebih panik lagi hahah..

Ehem.. this was also the time we got another packet of duit raya.. this time from the school. Yeayyyyy!!

Giler tamak kan hahahah..

But it was a fun time coz we also got to miss the first two classes la kot hahah..

*Aisyy.. makin rindu plak sy ngan zaman sekolah dulu*

Okay, nnt sambung.. wanna get ready for iftar jap dulu.. selamat berbuke ye! ☺

2nd Challenge ~ You Least Favourite Song

Sambil² menunggu rakan² yg dtg mengambil hasil dapur sy (Read: Makan at your own risk hahah..), felt like doing the next song challenge..

2nd Challenge ~ Your least favourite song!

Hahaha.. okay! Actually, this is tak la least favourite sgt.. I mean, klau least favourite, mcm giler bnyk lah kan lagunye so how can I choose? Instead, I'm choosing a song I wanna hate.

Why?

Coz the lyrics sgt la menunjukkan seorg lelaki bukan idaman yang perasan giler with no regards whatsoever klau the girl is enganged ke ape ke. When I first heard this song, I was like, "What the..?!?" Macam menyampah giler kan klau ade laki camni..

..and still you can't help loving this song! Hahah.. damn you, Uncle Cracker!



Follow Me ~ Uncle Cracker

You don't know how you met me
You don't know why, you cant turn around and say good-bye
All you know is when im with you I make you free
And swim through your veins like a fish in the sea
I'm singing....

Follow me
Everything is alright
I'll be the one to tuck you in at night
And if you want to leave
I can guarantee
You won't find nobody else like me

And I worry 'bout the ring you wear
Cause as long as no one knows
That nobody can care
Your fellin guilty
And I'm well aware
But you don't look ashamed
And baby I'm not scared
I'm singin...

Follow me
Everything is alright
I'll be the one to tuck you in at night
And if you want to leave
I can guarantee
You won't find nobody else like me

Solo

Won't give you money
I can't give you the sky
Its better off if you don't ask why
I'm not the reason that you go astray
We'll be alright if you don't ask me to stay

Follow me
Everything is alright
I'll be the one to tuck you in at night
And if you want to leave
I can guarantee
You won't find nobody else like me

You don't know how you met me
You don't know why, you cant turn around and say good-bye
All you know is when im with you I make you free
And swim through your veins like a fish in the sea
I'm singing....

Follow me
Everything is alright
I'll be the one to tuck you in at night
And if you want to leave
I can guarantee
You won't find nobody else like me

Terkenang saat itu.. Pt1

So yesterday was the mid of the weekend and I had initially planned to COOK! Masalahnye, bumi Pt Buntar/Nibong Tebal yg sudah lame tidak disirami hujan telah menerima rahmat yang besar spjg hari smlm. Makanya, perasaan sgt lah seronok duduk di rumah yg sejuk tanpe perlu aricon itu.. dan bile duduknye pun selese, mule la menjadi malas kan hehe..

Around 3.30pm, when I was ready to cook for iftar, I realized I hadn't defrosted the chicken yet.. so the perasaan malas won!

I got ready to go out to buy some supplies for my usual Ramadhan Project and decided to just go to the nearest bazaar at Nibong Tebal.. Ok la, actually Bandar Baharu punye lagi la dekat tp sy tidak berperasaan mau bersesak².

At the bazaar, I first noticed a cucur udang stall and was pleasantly suprised to see my student at the stall. Mule la nak nagco.. terlupe jap sy si Yazib ni pun kelas form 5 yg sy merajuk aritu hahah..

Anyway, maybe it was the sight of him ke.. or maybe sbb tetibe teringtkan my old students whom I nickname my bazaar Ramadhan stalker (hahah.. rindu kat diorg!), I suddenly found myself down memory lane..

*bunyi music ala² slow² tp tak romantic laaaa..*

Errkk.. pjg n jauh la pulak memory lane sy ni.. tak nmpk simapng kuar dah ni.. mane nak start ye?

Hmm.. I first felt the joy of Ramadhan during secondary school la kot.. Sblm tu mmg la puase semua tu, tp maybe sbb lame sgt dah kot I don't remember much of it..

Anyway, first time I celebrated Ramadhan away from home was in form 1. Mase tu pulak masuk AlMashoor kan. Nak kate syahdu sgt pun idak le kot sbb AlMashoor ngan my home pun dlm half an hours journey je pun hehe..

Well, first time sahur at the hostel, mcm konpius je.. Ye la, klau kat rumah, sahur 1st mesti la sedap², ni bile sahur kat hostel, mkn dia ala yg selalu mkn tghari tu je pun (ikan goreng, sayur masak sup). Mcm terkebil² jugak la kot time tu hehe..

The whole puasa day was like usual coz we still kene gi skola la sumer tu kan.. tp ptg tu, after Asar, was a new experience for me.. TADARUS!

Okay, in AlMashoor, we're supposed to Tadarus every morning pun. But we usually just recite the Al Quran together so this was the first time I had to recite Al Quran in front of 7~8 people who would be listening carefully to everything I read.. waaaaaa, kecut perut! Gile takuuuuuttt.. Dah la memang I don't really have the confidence in reciting the Al Quran, kali ni, terpakse pulak bace depan org.. seryes tergagap mcm ape je.. and sgt la malu sy rase.. but the seniors and my friend were kind enough to help me along the way so sikit demi sikit, I managed to get over the bumps.. wpun not entirely la (even sampai form 5 pun sy still takut bile Ustaz suruh bace dpn kelas) but at least I gained a bit of confidence kan ☺

Itu lah yg kitorg buat every Ramadhan sampai la we were in form 3 (Form 4 I no longer stayed in the hostel).. ye sy tau, skolah lain pun bnuat jugak.. but to me, it was a new experience.

Then, habis Tadarus, all of us got ready for iftar. Around 7pm dah boleh pegi dining hall dah beratur amik makanan. During Ramadhan, usually we'd sit with our roomates or 'ahli kamar' instead of with our friends. Seronok la jugak kan sbb once you've grown close to your classmates, agak jarang la jugak akan turun with bdk² kamar..

Haa.. mase ni pun terkebil² jugak.. sbb? Bukak puase mkn dlm tray hehe.. but the food was better than sahur la, of course.. Biasenye me and my bdk² kamar would go get our food, susun tray atas meje then go out to the garden ke ape ke to while the time away.. 5 minutes to iftar, everyone would have already been sitted and once azan je, everyone would eat.. the dining hall which was usually noisy akan sgt la sunyi sepi hahah..

Then, since mase tu mkn sgt cepat, even before azan Maghrib abis, ramai je dah abis makan.. boley? Sumer terus ke surau for Maghrib prayer. Biasenye during Ramadhan, mesti berjemaah² solat Maghrib nye. Sape abis makan dulu would pray with the first jemaah and sape yg kemudian would join the later one.

The usual post-Maghrib prep would be cancelled as we waited for Isya and tarawikh. during this time, student² cemerlang mmg will go to class to study la.. sy yg tidak la cemerlang sgt akan duk di kamar sembang with roomates while waiting. And when the time came, we'd all go to the musolla for Isya and tarawikh prayers together~

After prayers, we'd have our supper which was usually something nicer than the usual biscuits given to us. Rasenye sbb org sedekah kot something like that. Macam² la we got to eat during supper during Ramadhan. Laksa, mee kuah and such.. once in a while we'd get those milk or dadih from the Jabatan Haiwan (errkk, btul ke Jabatan ni eh?)

Then it was back to prep until 11.15pm.. then sleep. Simple kan hidup time tu.. and fun bile puase ramai² gitu (even if I DID dread the tadarus haha.. perangai tak senonoh sbb malu n takut org gelak sy bace Al Quran.. ade ke?)

Every year, there would be one day where both hostels (we had two different hostels at two different locations) would join together for a joint iftar with our teachers. During this time, we'd be asked to wear the hostel or school sorta uniform (baju batik laaa, not the white and blue baju kurung) and since the school musolla sgt la kecik, we'd perform our prayers on the netball court. Sejuk je.. and best! Solat bawah bintang weihhh, sape tak suke~ ☺

Sometimes, when I was in form 3, Aniza would ask me if I wanted to qiamullail with her. We had the qiam scheduled by the hostel but I'm glad I had friend who wanted to educate themselves to strengthen their belief. We weren't allowed to go to the musolla after 12am (Actually, I'm sure the warden tak kisah klau nak gi solat, she was only worried klau tido ke ape ke je dlm surau tu) so me, Aniza and Fikriah (kot.. I can't remember sape lagi) would stay up in our class eventhough lights off was at 12am.

Now, I don't remember where we got the idea but we sorta understood that Tahajjud can only be done if you had slept and bgn balik but mesti after 12am (skrg sy cari balik tp mcm tak perlu je.. yg afdhalnye is sepertige terakhir kan.. ke sy yg konpius ni ye?) so boleh tak, all of us will gilir² tidur hehe.. example, Monday would be my turn to not sleep so nnt only Ani and Fik je would qiam after I wake them up. Then Tuesday Ani pulak would not sleep as to wake us up to qiam and the cycle goes on mcm tu lah.. well, we were students.. agak jahil la kan but I love the fact that there was a give and take in here ☺

Now Ani is a teacher in Seri Nibong while Fik at SMKA Nibong Tebal.. and still I don't see them that much.. *sigh*

Mase form 2 pulak, lagi bes. Form 2s and form 4s stay at the hostel farther from school, at Jalan Perak so we had a bit of a freedom here. We were allowed to go out to Padang Brown everyday instead of only on Tuesdays so we enjoyed it here a bit more la kot.

But the best was when Ustazah Che Maznah and Cikgu Nab picked one night to give us duit raya. Giler seronok hokey.. and bkn itu aje, they bought us fireworks too!! Okay la, not la the noisy² ones, just the sparkles and the mercun you throw at people tu.. Hahah, I had a good time chasing Zahroh with a fistful of these.

Ohh, and also one they called mercun tarik.

Now the mercun tarik ni mcm special skit.. why? Our hostel at jalan Perak is like the long houses in Sarawak/Sabah and only had doors at each end as well as the very middle of it. Only the middle door was used tho so the girl in the kamar nearest to the door would tie up these mercun on peoples slippers. The fireworks were small and you wouldn't really notice it at first glance and most of us didn't notice them doing this as our kamar were far from the door.

So the name pun mercun tarik kan.. iamgine what happened when you wore a pair of slippers tied with the mercun and you tried to walk, thus 'tarik'king the mercun tarik along?

Hahah.. mmg nakal giler lah budak² tu haha..

I kinda missed the joy of Ramadhan at school once I stayed at home.. and I kinda miss it now.

Bes kan jadik budak² balik hehe..

Anyway, ade lagik ni nak citer, tp len entry.. dah nak imsak dah ni.. need to drink..

Selamat berpuase ye..

1st Challenge ~ Your Favourite Song

Okay.. sementara menunggu berbuke puasa, I thought I'd put in the first song in the challange.. Err.. TOLONG JGN GELAK ye, you guys hahah..

1st Challenge ~ Your favourite song!

Actually, as you guys know, sgt la susah wanna choose what is your favourite songs for all the songs you've loved for the past 31 16 years. I kept changing my choices. But in the end I settled with this.. Tadaaa~~~

Ye.. so I'm guilty of being a big fan of Westlife!

So dlm bnyk² lagu Westlife sy suke, why choose this one? Well, there's a story behind it, which always makes me smile whenever I feel.. err.. well.. unloved!

When I was in secondary school, Abah banned the TV from the house. Instead, we were left with the only stereo in the house which was located downstairs. Because of this, I always made it a point to do my homework at the dining table, instead of my 'well-equipped' bedroom. One reason was because, Ikram and Izati who stay in my room don't have a proper desk unlike the desk I had since the time I was a kid. The second reason, the radio was the ONLY entertainment time mlm², hokey!

Tu pun, sometimes Abah would switch of the radio, tak bg dgr sumer sbb takut we weren't doing homework and was mostly listening to the radio (which I was guilty of anyway.. tp my homework sentiase siap tau!). Dah la zaman Tok Nadoq tu dulu we only had Radio Muzik, aside form Radio Pulau Pinang.. mcm sedey tak? Hahah..

Anyway, because of this, I always switched of the radio whenever Abah came down to check on us. He was always grumbling on the things we listened to lah ape lah kannn.. the only thing he'd agree upon is if we switched on the CD player with his oldies songs hehe..

A few years in the future saw me going to USM la segale and falling in love with Westlife (haha..). My brothers knew about this but nobody else.. I thought la. Sbbnye, mase ni dah pandai beli Walkman sendiri (mase tu mane ade iPod segale male ye!) so I could listen in the privacy of my home. Mase tu pulak, Hitz and Mix baruuuu je started going on air so dah ade la choice skit in radio stations and once in a while, I'd still hear this song on the stereo downstairs tp bese la, control depan Abah, takut dia tak suke.

Then one day, Adi excitedly told me something. Mase tu, was the end of the year and he was still in school. So seperti biase, my family would troop towards the one and only Popular in Penang during that time, kat KOMTAR. 

Popular dulu bkn cam Popular skrg yg agak la senyap. Dulu, Popular rajin pasang² lagu la ape la kan. So here was Adi choosing the stationaries he needed for the school year with Abah when this song was aired throughout the store. It would have just passed Adi just like that if something didn't happen. Out of no where..

"Adi, ni lagu yang kak Yong suke tu kan?"

..dan Adi ternganga! Hahah.. 

Thats why balik tu, Adi trus told me what happened. Sape nak sangke, Abah actually knew what song I was into at that time! Haha.. sy terkejut, tp tak leh byg perasaan Adi nak terkejut mcmmane la kan coz he was the one who experienced it first-hand..

..and me, the girl who thought Abah never noticed anything about me, was suddenly feeling so loved!

Heheh.. boley?

So, here's to one of my most favourite songs all time ~ ♥ 

If I Let You Go ~ Westlife

Day after day
Time pass away
And I just can´t get you off my mind
Nobody knows

I hide it inside
I keep on searching but I can´t find

The courage to show
To letting you know
I´ve never felt so much love before
And once again I´m thinking about
Taking the easy way out

CHORUS:
But if I let you go
I will never know
What my life would be
Holding you close to me
Will I ever see
You smiling back at me
How will I know?
If I let you go


Night after night
I hear myself sayin´
Why can´t this feeling just fade away?
There´s no one like you
You speak to my heart
It´s such a shame we´re worlds apart

I´m too shy to ask
I´m too proud to lose
But sooner or later I gotta choose
And once again I´m thinking about

Taking the easy way out

CHORUS

Once again I´m thinking about
Taking the easy way out

Tatkale writing sy stuck dek writers block..

I've a 'date' with my supervisor tomorrow.. takuuuuuuuutt~~ Maklum la, dah lame tak jumpe kan hehe.. Actually, he's now back from his attachment at MIROS and he's VERY glad. He was supposed to come back last year tp jodoh dia ngan MIROS dilanjutkan, much to his disappointment (and mine too sbb I know, tanpe dia, berganda lah kemalasan sy hehe..)

Anyway, I've checked and rechecked all the things to present to him tomorrow.. but it must be jitters or something, ade je tak cukup. Kejap bende ni ilang.. kejap bende tu ilang. And just now after tarawikh, I had to go back to school to search for a missing important file (Yup! Hardcopy nye file, bkn softcopy --> Note to self: Tolong la jgn dok save file merate² dlm dlm PC, boley tak Ayu? Pastu kalut bile tak jumpe.. aisshhhh!)

Now I'm reading back a few chapters of my thesis and terase seperti kate² yg ku nukilkan tidak seindah bahase ku semase MSc.. aaarrrgghhhhhh!!!

Untuk mencari ilham, ku mengodek² desktop ku.. (Okay, cut the 'ku' crap.. I don't even talk that way kan hehe..) I found this 'challenge' I got from Mas a few weeks ago which I meant to do but never really did it yet. Nak tau challenge ape? <--Ceh! Kunun mystery la tuuuu

30 Day Song Challenge!

Basically, err, well, the name of the challenge tell it all dah kan. You have this list of songs to put in your blog for 30 days, according to certain syarat la. Lemme copy and paste them here

Day 01 – Your favorite song
Day 02 – Your least favorite song
Day 03 – A song that makes you happy
Day 04 – A song that makes you sad
Day 05 – A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 – A song that reminds of you of somewhere
Day 07 – A song that reminds you of a certain event
Day 08 – A song that you know all the words to
Day 09 – A song that you can dance to
Day 10 – A song that makes you fall asleep
Day 11 – A song from your favorite band
Day 12 – A song from a band you hate
Day 13 – A song that is a guilty pleasure
Day 14 – A song that no one would expect you to love
Day 15 – A song that describes you
Day 16 – A song that you used to love but now hate
Day 17 – A song that you hear often on the radio
Day 18 – A song that you wish you heard on the radio
Day 19 – A song from your favorite album
Day 20 – A song that you listen to when you’re angry
Day 21 – A song that you listen to when you’re happy
Day 22 – A song that you listen to when you’re sad
Day 23 – A song that you want to play at your wedding
Day 24 – A song that you want to play at your funeral
Day 25 – A song that makes you laugh
Day 26 – A song that you can play on an instrument
Day 27 – A song that you wish you could play
Day 28 – A song that makes you feel guilty
Day 29 – A song from your childhood
Day 30 – Your favorite song at this time last year

So there! Hehe.. now I have 30 guaranteed entries in my blog.. aci?

So according to Mas, tak payah la pi carik every day. Ni mcm suke² only so takyah la start 11 August then benti 11 September nnt pulak kan.. yeayy!!

Hmm.. bile nak start? *takde idea la pulak.. same je ngan thesis.. haiyaaaaa~~

And it goes without saying..

Turns out, it wasn't just a simple crush, huh?

Guess I really did fall in ♥ with you!

Now I just need a way to fall out of it..

='(

AND.. *drum rolls*

I'm back!! ☺

Tetibe.. haha..

(Around 1 month and 5 days.. hmm, not bad, huh?)



='(

Tak yah cari gaduh..

boleh tak?

="(