Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Do You Remember What You Did Exactly A Year Ago?

I do..

I remember wanting to stay in bed, exhausted after days of trying to unpack and choose what to leave in the boxes. The house is much smaller than the last one so it was kinda a chore to prioritize.. but still, fun in a way :)

I remember hearing the phone ringing and wondering who was calling me early in the morning. I didn't manage to pick up the phone in time but I remember feeling my heart fall down to the pit of my stomach when I saw who it was. It wouldn't have been a problem if someone else had not shared with me her observation of me involving this person a few days before this so I got scared and purposely misplaced my phone (yes, I could actually do that, being the scatterbrain me). Purposely also being me not looking for my phone when I realized it wasn't near me (and since I was still unpacking, mmg tak susah la nak misplace phone tu pun).

I wonder if things would have been different if I hadn't had that discussion with my friend. If my friend hadn't shared with me the change she saw in me. If I wasn't too scared that she was right and I was putting myself in for another heartbreak. If I was brave enough to face it, who knows, I would've gotten over it looooong ago. Might even realize (or at least, convinced myself) that she was wrong..

I wish things were different, you know, coz this sucks!

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