Saturday, February 25, 2017

Phantom Pain?

The scar hurts sometimes. Mostly the ovariectomy one (new words you learn, huh..) but the appendectomy one too sometimes.

I'd joked with Izati before, it sometimes hurts when it's raining or cold but nowadays it gets more frequent (maybe because it's raining a bit more than usual jugak kot?) It doesn't 'hurt' hurt.. More like discomfort hurt. Like it's being jerked from inside but just a quick jerk, not a prolonged one.

I sometimes want to share this with someone but I'm afraid if I'm just being dramatic so I just keep quiet about it.

I did tell Dayah about it the other day, only because I was worried. I was so relieved when she didn't act as if I was being dramatic but she told me to take more care of myself as I don't know the inside condition of my wound. The outside does seem to heal but it's the inside that I should be extra careful about.. and she told me that that may be the reason of my discomfort (sambil jeling cakap Ayu ni bukan tau dok diam haha..)

I thought of doing the pantang thing all over again because I've been eating to much eggs and chicken (which I was told NOT to eat then) but those are the only things that are easy to get. The market here doesn't have much choice of fish and I'm too lazy to go to the Pt Buntar market eversince moving here.

I'm still worried though but I think it's okay.. Maybe just a phantom pain, right? Because I'm still too conscious of the ugly scars and everytime it hurts, my hand automatically goes to the scar and I can feel the ridges and such..

I wish I wasn't too conscious of these scars though.. ðŸ˜¦ðŸ˜§ðŸ˜¨

No comments: