Saya kah? Awak kah?

Last day I watched the last episode of Epilog Syurga Cinta. Now, I'm not someone who follows any kind of soap actually tp sbb mase bulan puase aritu dah tertengok, jadik la berperasaan nak tengok lagik. Mau pulak ade si budak Mia itu. I'm not good at rating any soap series ke movies ke but for this, I'd say ok² je la kot. Pleasing la nak tengok cume sedikit kuciwe with the finale yg cam tak bes langsung.. seriusly!

Anyway, sy pun bkn la nak tulis pasal the series. Tgk pun dah separuh dah start aritu. What tickled me was the scene between the kids. Bukan la sbb budak² tu lucu.. tp sbb conversation between two kindergarten kids menggunekan kate ganti diri 'saya' dan 'awak'.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but the trend we have here for Malays is kids usually use their names when referring to themselves while talking to anyone.. btul ke tak? Mane ade budak² kecik cakap 'saya' and 'awak'.. so those scenes kinda felt unrealistic la.

Though it did make me wonder, growing up, did I ever sound that strange ek?

When I was in primary school, I took a leaf outta everyones book and used 'kami' to refer to myself as well as 'hangpa' (the Northeren dialect) for you. But as I entered the second term of school and my friends progressed to 'aku' and 'hang' (also Northeren dialect), I stuck with 'kami' and 'hangpa'. That was until cikgu Noerida corrected me, pointing out that 'kami' actually referred to A LOT of people (as in 'we') so she suggested I started using 'saya' and 'awak'. Since she was my FAVOURITE teacher, I followed suit and guess what.. it stuck till now! I was 7 years old then and 30 now haha.. bayangkan brape tahun dah sy ckp camni..

Even to my immediate and extended family, I don't refer to myself using my name, Ayu. Instead, I also use 'I' or 'saya' so I'm the odd one out in Abah's extended family (all my siblings and cousins use their names when refering to themselves) and almost an odd one out in Mama's except that some of my cousins, my Mak Yang's children also all use 'saya' when talking to everyone.

I think I wrote about this once la dulu.. haaa.. --> here

Anyway, this habit of mine always raises an eyebrow or two whenever I go someplace new. Like when I first entered secondary school, I was teased for being too proper (gune 'saya' and 'awak' tu was like sgt la ikut bahasa buku kaaaaannn) but in the end my friends accepted this in me though most still thought I was strange (dah la tatau ckp Penang kaaaaann hahah..)

In matrics I was also teased. A guy even called me 'biawak' for the sole reason of me using the word 'awak' when most of them used 'hang' or 'kau' but I really couldn't change the way I talk.. despite feeling a bit hurt when some girls called me 'skema' just for talking that way.

Then, sometime during my undergraduate years, I realized my 'aku' 'ko' friends were using 'saya' and 'awak' when talking to their partners or to people they like. Aisehhh.. this made me squirm when talking to boys coz I didn't want people to misunderstand me but try as I might, I still couldn't change.

And now, using 'saya' and 'awak' seems to be the cool IN thing la plak tetibe hahahah.. even if most of them sound a bit fake (acikah sy ckp camtu?). If people only knew what I went through growing up using these two words in all conversations.. ☺