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Friday, March 14, 2008

Dining utensils or bare hands?


I'm one of those tak sedar diri Malays who SELDOM watch Malay soap operas. Whenever I watch them, I'd be criticizing (I don't think I got the spelling right there!) everything hahah.. Cube bagi Ayu buat citer, tgk jadi ke tak heheh.. cam terre but still, most of us know Malay punye sgt typical so agak bosan la for me.

Anyway, last week, I came back from work a bit late and sangat penat nak masuk bilik so I flicked on the tv. There was this thing playing on the tv and for the reason of nothing else better, I watched it. In one of the scenes, this boy asked this girl out. Kunun² this girl from 'kampung' la kot coz this guy's mum said to him, "Nak bawak dia pergi restoran 5-star ke? Hmm, pastikan dia pegang sudu dan garfu (or was it 'pisau dan garfu?')di tangan yang betul.."

What the hell?

You know, a few years ago I went out with a few friends (and their friends) and we decided to go eat at this new Western restaurant. While eating, I noticed this girl (an-almost friend of mine) smirking at me while watching me eat. I was feeling a bit uncomfy and was wondering if I had sauce on my chin or something when she suddenly blurted out, "Ayu ni, mesti tak biase makan Western kan? Kesian pulak saya tengok.."

I was like, "You kidding me?".. inside my head la of course. Instead, I gave an overly sweet smile st her and asked her why.. Know what she said?

She said, I dunno how to eat like a Westerner. Gesturing to her own hands, she told me, to eat Western food, you have to hold your knife in you right hand and fork in your left hand.. thus, in this arrangement, its also proper to eat with your left hand as opposed to our Sunnah to eat with our right hand. When I was quiet, she went on and on about how weird I am and how people must laugh watching me eat as I'm not proper..

I was fuming!

..but I managed to give her a smile before excusing myself to the ladies!

When I was more calm, I went back to the table and asked her if she was right-handed or left-handed. And she was like the majority of the world who are right-handed so in an equally calm manner (just like the time she told me off for being 'weird') I told her, the knife is used for cutting up the pieces of food (or for stabbing her eye, if I choose to do so!) so how am I supposed to do a neat job of cutting if I use my weaker right-hand, thus the reason for me using my left hand.

Then, giving her the sweetest smile ever, I pretended to look around and be 'suprised' that almost everyone (including non-Muslims) in the restaurant were eating with their right hand. They do this by cutting up their food first, then putting down their knife and pick up their forks with their right hand again and eat.. and trying my best but not actually succeeding (purposely la of course haha..), I sorta pointed out that she was the only one eating with her left hand when the fact was, I was the one who was left-handed here (if I wanted to 'prove' to her how 'frail' my right hand is laaaa..)

Well, okay.. actually, I don't care if she eats with her right hand or left hand or with her feet pun, lantak le ikut suke hati dia. But I was annoyed when she told me I looked like some uncivilised person when I used the WRONG hands for my utensils. Sheesh! Then she defended herself by saying, in Western tv shows, everyone eats with their left hand.. hah!!!

Tv shows? Huh.. berlagak cam hape.. upenye sbb tgk tv je ke.. ceh! Ingatkan amik ettique course ke hape ke.. Its not like I was eating like a caveman (camne ek caveman makan?) ke ape ke.. mende ahhhhh!

But from that day on, I get annoyed whenever anyone makes a big deal outta eating utensils and which hand it goes to.. C'mon la, in the end, bile masuk perut, same je dah rupenye :p

A few weeks ago pulak, we went to Pizza Hut to get some pizza. Puga wanted to treat us so we went there, 4 people including me. Lets call the other two G (for being a girl) and B (for being the only male in the group haha..)

Now, I always eat my pizza with my bare hands. I know some people prefer to eat it with a fork and knife coz they don't want to dirty their hand or have smelly hands afterward, suke hati korang la kan though I really think eating with your bare hands is more satisfying but thats just me and my humble opinion.

As we sat down to fill in our tummies, I was laughing at B who looked so awkward eating his slice. The truth is, B is actually a very shy guy so that was the real reason behind him looking like he was not used to eating with his bare hands. Puga kept scolding me but I kept on teasing the shy B making him even more embarassed hahah..

Towards the end of the meal, I finally noticed G had eaten her share with her bare hands (she usually uses a fork and knife). Then, as we were are complaining of our full stomachs, G suddenly said, "Tak sangka pulak makan piza ngan tangan lagi puas.. tapi klau omputih tgk kite makan, depe mesti gelak kan kite kan sbb kite macam orang tak betul makan ngan tangan.."

And once again.. What the hell?

She went on again about, kesian B, dia malu nak makan ngan tangan.. and I dunno, guess I was still pissed with the earlier incident (yang sudah bertahun berlalu sebenarnye hahah <--Ayu sgt teruk!). I just looked and her and said, "Pizza memang makan ngan tangan laaaaa! Orang Melayu je berlagak nak makan ngan fork and knife!" A bit harsh maybe.. adeh! Ayu sgt sensitip and bertambah teruk hahah!!!

I mean for one thing, ade ke cakap camtu.. kot Italians yang gelak tgk org makan piza ngan fork and knife. Its considered finger food kan.. and like its namesake, its meant to be eaten with your fingers.. (just for arguments sake, I looked in wikipedia hahah --> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Finger_food Notice that pizza is 'listed' there?). I mean, would you eat your Fillet-O-Fish with a fork and knife? Sheesh!! Kenape kene fikir, all foreign food kene makan with fork and knife and spoon?!?!

Besides, it made me wonder what did she think of me everytime we went for a pizza (which is very often) as I ALWAYS eat with my bare hands. Ntah² she had the same thought as my almost-friend kat atas tu.. and I'm kinda sensitive about that issue till now hahah..

Takde la, c'mon la.. Kenape kene fikir teruk² pasal cara nak makan.. makan je la. Dlm perut nnt same je.. kuar nnt pun same je! Like dulu when KFC gives out fork and knife whenever we dine-in. Ade ke tengok orang keliling makan finger-licken' fried chicken with a fork and knife?! Get real la you guys, puas ke makan camtu?

Tapi seriously, I don't give a damn on how you guys wanna eat, just stop criticizing the way I eat la.. its not as if I eat sloppily ke eat with my nostrils ke ape ke. Okay la, sometimes my hijab does get smeared with sauce or curry (like some people have personally seen hahah..), but its not as if I'm eating cam orang tatau makan. Let me eat with my hands.. you guys can eat with your shoes for all I care!

And seriously, when I think about it, why do I even have to explain myself to the people of the likes of my almost-friend and G.. sheesh! Those kinda people bring out the worst in me..

So shooo! Go away!!! I'm gonna eat my food in peace, if you'd excuse me, please :)

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