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Sunday, April 24, 2011

Being my own worst enemy.. =(


Please don't hate me ='(

Its been a bad week for me..

Finally, I did something I've been meaning to do for months now but the relieved feeling I was hoping for still hasn't shown up and I'm feeling a bit worse at the moment but my guess is, this is better than what I've been feeling (or trying not to feel) these past few months.. eventhough deep down inside, I know I'm ruining something beautiful and something thats been so meaningful in my life.. Believe me, I wouldn't have wanted to let it go..

Gosh.. why can't I stop crying?!?

I wish so much to talk to someone about it but I can't bring myself to do so. I've tried talking to my brother, but the lump in my throat just gets bigger, chocking me of the things I wish I could just let out. I tried talking to a dear friend, but found myself tongue-tied whenever she asks me about it and last night I tried talking to a dear ol' friend who has always been my shoulder to cry on.. but I just couldn't..

..and my heart gets heavier and heavier.. ='(

I keep wishing I could clarify things with the person involved but I know I'm too much of a coward for it. I just hope I'm not making things harder than its supposed to be..

..and I wish I'd stop being such a broken dam!

3 comments:

chapaticokelat^^ said...

kadang2 .. belum cakap apa2 pun, dah termangu mangu ..

camno nak buek tu ..

Irfan Zaidi said...

Sabar la ckgu .. ujian je suma nie ..
if u need sum1 to talk to .. u know i'm always there 4 u .. :-p

Ayu Ikhwani said...

Capaticokelat: Sapekah anda.. hehe, sowi tanye.. hmm.. camne ye?

Irfan: Aikkk.. time entry emo² la pun awak wujud nih.. buat malu say je hahah..